We've talked about my "celebrity crushes" before. And we all know I'm odd. So this post shouldn't surprise you.
I may or may not have prayed to meet Gary Haugen during the Justice Conference.
Okay. I did. I did pray I would meet Gary Haugen during the conference.
Gary Haugen, President (and CEO) of International Justice Mission. Writer of "Just Courage" (and several other books but Just Courage changed my life so...).
This man, this organization do amazing work. I'm more than a fan.
And my coworker Jason King, coworker and guy I all around like and admire, earned my everlasting ire and jealousy when he got to meet him at Passion 2013 and I didn't.
Gary Haugen was one of the main reasons I wanted to go to the conference. I'd never gotten to hear him speak in person and knew it was going to be amazing. And, just as an added bonus, thought it would be great to meet him. So I prayed a silly prayer.
The night of the conference, I had gotten in late. I was texting a friend of mine at the conference while walking into the motel. I was trying to find out who all was speaking that night. I was exhausted and frankly considering skipping it. But what if I missed Gary Haugen??? I actually texted my friend "If I miss GH, I'm going to be ticked" while standing in line at our motel waiting to register. And then I looked up (side note: look up from your phone on a regular basis so you don't miss anything!)...and there, standing right in front of me at the counter, was Gary Haugen. I went totally fan girl. I got flushed, may have gasped, grasped my children by the arm and "whispered" (who am I kidding...me? whisper?) 'There's Gary Haugen!' I texted my friend "GH is standing right in front of me!!!!!!" And then, tried to consider what to say to him as I introduced myself...I had nothing. Well, that's not true. Lot's of gushing. Lots of "OH MY GOD YOU ARE GARY HAUGEN" but I kind of assumed he was aware of who he was. Some "JUST COURAGE IS SUCH AN AWESOME BOOK! IT CHANGED MY LIFE!" It almost drove me to tears. I couldn't think of a single intelligent conversation starter. Two days before I'd had lunch and intelligent conversation with Katherine Chon...and now I was a blithering idiot.
I couldn't do it. Admittedly, if he'd been alone, I might have stepped forward goofy grin and outreached palm. But he was engaged in what appeared to be a serious conversation with two men and somehow interrupting that conversation to star gaze and humiliate myself with obtrusive gushing didn't seem appropriate. So he walked away, never noticing me.
The young man behind the counter noticed me and asked "Who was that guy? He's got VIP written all over him but I've never heard of him" I opened my mouth and then closed it, checked my attitude and explained who the man headed up to his room was and the impact he had on people like me and the issue of social justice. Because I'd checked my attitude before speaking (as in, I didn't say "OH MUH GAWD, HOW CAN YOU NOT KNOW WHO HE IS???), we had a great conversation. And the guys spent the next three days scoping out the place trying to see if he could spot Mr. Haugen and arrange for me to meet him.
Here's my point(s):
1) It's okay to pray silly prayers. And sometimes God will give it to you just to remind you He knows the desires of your heart. Sometimes He might give them to you just to show you it wasn't quite as important as you thought it was.
2) God's answers don't always look like we expect. And we need to be okay with that.
3) Letting go of something you want because it's the right thing to do...is the right thing to do. Believe it or not, there are more important things than the things you want.
One day I'll meet Gary Haugen. Or not. One day Jen Hatmaker and I will be best buds. Or not. But God knows me, loves me, sees me. And that is enough.
Tuesday, March 19, 2013
Road Trip!!!
We still haven't done that. But we did plan a road trip we got to take! It was a great time and showed the kids that plans can happen! That's two vacations in a row that we've planned and taken! We're on a roll! (Last year was Universal Studios)
This trip started in Tennessee. Our first stop was Dayton and two and a half days at Bryan College. I'd been asked to attend a conference as speaker and representative of Wellspring Living.
While we were there, we got to know some fantastic students, including these three: Amanda, Rose and Maddie. They are members of SSTOP (Students Stopping the Trafficking of Persons) and more than that they are amazing young women destined to change the world. While on campus I was super impressed with Bryan College's commitment to teaching the issue as well as motivating students to do something about it. The conference was titled "Freedom Matters" and focused on domestic trafficking. I got to speak to a class and then a luncheon. I lost count of the conversations with students and faculty. Bree and Trey had a great time as well. Everyone was amazingly welcoming!
No big deal but Katherine Chon (co founder of Polaris Project) was one of the speakers and I got to have lunch with her! I managed not to embarrass myself!
We moved on from Dayton to Nashville and got to see this girl! Jessica is a friend of mine and former coworker at Wellspring Living. She moved to Nashville several months ago and the office hasn't been quite the same without her!
We made our way from Nashville to Columbus, Ohio (our stop for the night enroute to Philadelphia) and hit a spot of wintry weather! Total respect for the salt trucks!!!
The Justice Conference gets it's on blog...
A day in Washington DC was the last stop before the 14 hour drive home (in the rain). I'd briefly visited DC before as a teenager but this was the first time I ever got to explore. I've always suspected I would love it...I was right. We spent about five hours on the mall, visited the Holocaust Museum, and the Capital. We're planning a return trip to see everything we didn't have time for (including the Smithsonian)
The Martin Luther King memorial is amazing. Again, after spending so much time discussing, hearing about and being immersed in the topic of social justice, freedom, etc this was an amazing moment for me. Luckily my kids love me and either understand or overlook my emotional lapses (lol)
The Lincoln Memorial. I was once told or read that the sculptor very deliberately portrayed two very different sides to Lincoln...the relaxed, laid back Lincoln on the right (stage left theatre friends) and the determined-and fatigued-side on the left. I looked at his clenched hand, his leg positioned as if to get up and I thought "The fight, Mr President, is now ours"
Saturday, March 2, 2013
I Got Called...Part 3
Okay, okay...I never intended for this to become a trilogy. But Embree was there and kind of demanded it (in a completely non brat like kind of way)...And I can't resist.
If you haven't read "I Got Called..." Parts 1&2 you might be confused but they aren't necessary. However, if you feel like your life isn't complete: Part One and Part Two.
And now, we present
I Got Called "Nice Lady" in Wal-Mart
So here is the scenario. It's about 10:30 at night. I haven't eaten all day...well, I mean, I ate two Samoa cookies but I really don't think I need to confess that...right? Bree and I have just left rehearsal and we need to pick up groceries for dinner. I decide to go to Wal Mart because I'd returned some things and now I have a gift card (because I can't keep up with receipts apparently).
So we are in Wal Mart and we have just planned the perfect meal. Meatloaf, mac and cheese, corn and biscuits (canned because it is way too late to make real ones!). We are so hungry we are practically salivating. I mean...it's kind of a desperate and perhaps a bit pathetic. But we're having our usual Battles fun as well.
We get to the self check out and we total everything up...and we're exactly twenty-five cents short.
Our perfect meal is ruined. I've got to put something back.
Only, without any actual thought, I look at the couple standing at the register in front of us and ask if they have a quarter. Normally I would never do this. First of all, its kind of pitiful to ask strangers for money so you can afford can biscuits. Secondly, well...it's just pitiful.
The guy feels in his pocket and instead of saying no, turns to the guy in front of him and says "Hey, do you have twenty five cents this nice lady can have?" And the guy-who is talking on his cell phone the entire time-reaches in his pocket and hands the first guy two dimes and a nickel and the first guy hands it to me. It does occur to me to be embarrassed at this point so I start to apologize but both guys and the girl with the first guy are all like "Don't worry about it" and they are so nice and seem genuinely pleased to have helped someone.
And we have our biscuits.
So, here's a few take aways.
1) I have to tell you that both the first guy and the second guy do not look like altruistic do gooder kind of people. The first guy would be the type that many of us would instinctively lock our doors if he walked toward our car. The second guy looked like the type that flip people off in traffic. This is another one of those "don't judge by the cover" lessons. I mean, I wasn't afraid of either of them but if you'd put them in a line up and asked me which of the two men would most likely be generous to me that day, I wouldn't have said them. And I-for the most part-and pretty open minded. I mean, I know a wide variety of people and have known some good hearted red necks and scumbags alike. Don't just automatically discount people because of their age, sense of fashion, or overall look. Give everyone a chance to be someone special, to do something good, to make someone's day.
2) Ask for help. We all love to be independent and "I got this" but it's okay to be vulnerable and let others help you.
3) Random acts of kindness go a long way. I cannot even tell you how that made my day. The generous and sweet way that was handled. He could have said "this lady" or "them" or anything but he called me "nice" I thought how Eugene Cho told the story of trying to identify with the homeless so he sat outside a store for three days with a hat for change. He collected a fair amount of change but not once did someone look him in the eyes. We have to give people their humanity no matter how much change we give or don't give them.
And in case you are wondering...the meal was delicious.
If you haven't read "I Got Called..." Parts 1&2 you might be confused but they aren't necessary. However, if you feel like your life isn't complete: Part One and Part Two.
And now, we present
I Got Called "Nice Lady" in Wal-Mart
So here is the scenario. It's about 10:30 at night. I haven't eaten all day...well, I mean, I ate two Samoa cookies but I really don't think I need to confess that...right? Bree and I have just left rehearsal and we need to pick up groceries for dinner. I decide to go to Wal Mart because I'd returned some things and now I have a gift card (because I can't keep up with receipts apparently).
So we are in Wal Mart and we have just planned the perfect meal. Meatloaf, mac and cheese, corn and biscuits (canned because it is way too late to make real ones!). We are so hungry we are practically salivating. I mean...it's kind of a desperate and perhaps a bit pathetic. But we're having our usual Battles fun as well.
We get to the self check out and we total everything up...and we're exactly twenty-five cents short.
Our perfect meal is ruined. I've got to put something back.
Only, without any actual thought, I look at the couple standing at the register in front of us and ask if they have a quarter. Normally I would never do this. First of all, its kind of pitiful to ask strangers for money so you can afford can biscuits. Secondly, well...it's just pitiful.
The guy feels in his pocket and instead of saying no, turns to the guy in front of him and says "Hey, do you have twenty five cents this nice lady can have?" And the guy-who is talking on his cell phone the entire time-reaches in his pocket and hands the first guy two dimes and a nickel and the first guy hands it to me. It does occur to me to be embarrassed at this point so I start to apologize but both guys and the girl with the first guy are all like "Don't worry about it" and they are so nice and seem genuinely pleased to have helped someone.
And we have our biscuits.
So, here's a few take aways.
1) I have to tell you that both the first guy and the second guy do not look like altruistic do gooder kind of people. The first guy would be the type that many of us would instinctively lock our doors if he walked toward our car. The second guy looked like the type that flip people off in traffic. This is another one of those "don't judge by the cover" lessons. I mean, I wasn't afraid of either of them but if you'd put them in a line up and asked me which of the two men would most likely be generous to me that day, I wouldn't have said them. And I-for the most part-and pretty open minded. I mean, I know a wide variety of people and have known some good hearted red necks and scumbags alike. Don't just automatically discount people because of their age, sense of fashion, or overall look. Give everyone a chance to be someone special, to do something good, to make someone's day.
2) Ask for help. We all love to be independent and "I got this" but it's okay to be vulnerable and let others help you.
3) Random acts of kindness go a long way. I cannot even tell you how that made my day. The generous and sweet way that was handled. He could have said "this lady" or "them" or anything but he called me "nice" I thought how Eugene Cho told the story of trying to identify with the homeless so he sat outside a store for three days with a hat for change. He collected a fair amount of change but not once did someone look him in the eyes. We have to give people their humanity no matter how much change we give or don't give them.
And in case you are wondering...the meal was delicious.
Slacktivism (the art of doing nothing and feeling good about it)
"Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.”
The Great Commission. As Christians, we know it...we've probably memorized it in small group or VBS. Some of us live it out and others claim to not "be called" but the reality is we are all called to it to one degree or other. We are all called to make Christ known. We are called to proclaim freedom to the oppressed, to take care of widows and orphans, to show the love of Christ to the world.
I'm not saying that everyone give up their jobs and go into missions or that everyone must devote 24/7 to the cause of social justice but I am saying that everyone has to do something. And something requires action...Christ says we are to teach so that people know to obey...not just so they know. The knowledge compels-demands-action.
We live in an unprecedented time of knowledge and I'm afraid that somehow we feel that just by knowing something, we have fulfilled our obligation or responsibility. Relevant magazine recently wrote an article on "slacktivism" (a combination of the word "slack" or "slacker" and "activism"). I highly suggested it as a read and you can find it here:
http://www.relevantmagazine.com/reject-apathy/worldview/slacktivism
The idea is that by knowing something and using social media to "like" a page or read an article or that by retweeting a tweet or link from a local non-profit, we have somehow done our part.
Don't get me wrong, knowledge is incredibly powerful and social media is a huge part in that. I use it, my friends and favorite organizations use it. It's fantastic! But if that is all we do, it's only part of it. The Bible tells us that if we tell a hungry person "I'll pray for you" but don't give them food, we have not done as we ought. The same goes for passive aggressive activism. If you "like" Not For Sale on Facebook and then do nothing to change your buying habits, what have you accomplished? Have you made a difference in the lives of the estimated 27 million slaves in the world today? No. My daughter tells me there is a meme of a hungry child holding an empty bowl and the caption reads "Don't worry, I liked your page on Facebook" This is disturbing but an unconscious attitude so many have these days.
I realize the issues are huge and the tasks are daunting. The reality is the impact you make is most likely going to be a small one. But it is an impact. And if everyone made a small impact the change would be amazing to see. Remember the story about the star fish? Two guys walking on the beach, one guy stopping to throw starfish back into the ocean...the one guy tells the other guy not to bother because he can't help them all and the guy replies as he throws another starfish back into the water "helped that one" Imagine what happens if the entire community goes out there and throws one, two or three starfish back into the water! The more people making an effort, the more that can be done...even if it is a small effort!
So here are three small ways to save a starfish. I'd encourage you to start with at least one of them. And make a commitment with three of your friends, your small group, your book club to do something at least once a month to put knowledge and love into action for the greater good.
1) Project Live Love http://projectlivelove.com/
Project Live Love exists to influence culture by showing love. They have quarterly service projects as well as a project called "Three Oh We Go" where they pass out blankets to the homeless any time the temperature goes below freezing. I challenge you to participate in one of the service projects or even do a blanket drive for them.
2) Polaris Project and International Justice Mission both have e-blasts you can sign up for to receive important information and action alerts when important legislation is being discussed in Congress. Sign up for one and the next time they ask you to contact your Representative or Senator, do it! (Make sure you are signed up to vote before doing so.) The reason the Violence Against Women's Act passed with the Trafficking Victims Protection Act as an amendment last week was because of the number of voters who let their elected officials know it was an important issue to them. You have a voice, use it.
3) Be aware of what you buy. A deal is a deal and we all need to save money. But what if that item is so cheap because the cost of labor was so little? A great way to know what the supply chain for an item looks like is the "Free 2 Work" app. Download it. Use it. Find more info and the app at http://www.free2work.org/.
There are so many other things you can do...and feel free to share them if you have ideas. I'd also love to hear stories of things you and your friends do or have done.
Knowledge is power. So learn more. And don't trust everything you read on social media. Do your research and listen to people with opposing view points. Then use that knowledge to affect good and change.We can accomplish much...but not by being slacktivists.
Thursday, February 21, 2013
Dear Dad
Dear Dad,
Where has this year gone. This time last year we were at the hospital, faced with the truth...believing for the impossible. I think of those hours, of you in the bed...unresponsive. I wanted to tell you goodbye. To see you open your eyes one more time. To see me. I know we'd said everything there is to say...I just wanted to say and hear it one more time.
Just a couple of months before, you were in the hospital, faced with losing your leg and I was by your side. We got in this huge argument (you-by the way-were a terrible patient!) and I told you I'd go if you wanted...you told me no, you wanted me to stay. The rest of the evening was tense but, as we were going to sleep, you told me you loved me and you were glad I was there. I told you I loved you right back and I was glad to be there. You beat the odds the next morning and kept your leg. And I went home that afternoon.
That moment defines so much about our relationship. So much hurt from the past. So much hard headed-ness on both sides. So many arguments. But always love. And no matter what, I am so glad you were my Dad. As in, if God gave me the choice to go back and make my choice, I'd choose you.
This year seems to have gone by so fast...and yet it sometimes seems to be even longer than a year. I still think "Dad would like this" or think "I need to call Dad" before remembering...I still think of you every time I see Diet Dr Pepper or a Budweiser sign. I don't always cry these days...but you always cross my mind. I think of your laugh and they way you said "Hey now..."
I think you'd be glad of how close Kristy and I have been. I think you'd be glad how close we are all to Aunt Penny. You'd be proud of her and-I hope-of us and the way we handled your passing.
I wish so many things...but I trust in a good God. And because I trust Him, I've let go of the "why?" and held on to the good, to the love. I'm going to miss you always.
Your "#1 gal"
Where has this year gone. This time last year we were at the hospital, faced with the truth...believing for the impossible. I think of those hours, of you in the bed...unresponsive. I wanted to tell you goodbye. To see you open your eyes one more time. To see me. I know we'd said everything there is to say...I just wanted to say and hear it one more time.
Just a couple of months before, you were in the hospital, faced with losing your leg and I was by your side. We got in this huge argument (you-by the way-were a terrible patient!) and I told you I'd go if you wanted...you told me no, you wanted me to stay. The rest of the evening was tense but, as we were going to sleep, you told me you loved me and you were glad I was there. I told you I loved you right back and I was glad to be there. You beat the odds the next morning and kept your leg. And I went home that afternoon.
That moment defines so much about our relationship. So much hurt from the past. So much hard headed-ness on both sides. So many arguments. But always love. And no matter what, I am so glad you were my Dad. As in, if God gave me the choice to go back and make my choice, I'd choose you.
This year seems to have gone by so fast...and yet it sometimes seems to be even longer than a year. I still think "Dad would like this" or think "I need to call Dad" before remembering...I still think of you every time I see Diet Dr Pepper or a Budweiser sign. I don't always cry these days...but you always cross my mind. I think of your laugh and they way you said "Hey now..."
I think you'd be glad of how close Kristy and I have been. I think you'd be glad how close we are all to Aunt Penny. You'd be proud of her and-I hope-of us and the way we handled your passing.
I wish so many things...but I trust in a good God. And because I trust Him, I've let go of the "why?" and held on to the good, to the love. I'm going to miss you always.
Your "#1 gal"
Wednesday, February 13, 2013
Best Goodwill Ever!
The Goodwill in McDonough? Ah-maz-ing!
Not sure if it is normal for them to have these or it was just brilliant stroke of luck but:
Check out my super cool boots that my super cool, amazing son bought me for my birthday!
And look at Bree's find. Gorgeous dress and awesome fairy costume! Ren Fest here we come!
They have a great selection of normal clothes too. Pretty well organized in size and color! The only thing that drove me batty was the books. They have huge selection and they aren't organized by title or author and since I was looking for one particular book, it practically gave me a headache. Prices are good...staff are slightly unfriendly but not so bad I won't go back! Our costumer says this one is her favorite too and seeing as how much time she spends in Goodwills and thrift stores, that is saying something! So go check it out when you get the chance!
Not sure if it is normal for them to have these or it was just brilliant stroke of luck but:
Check out my super cool boots that my super cool, amazing son bought me for my birthday!
Resolutions & Dating
"Slightly neurotic, somewhat overweight, Christian single mom of two teenagers, 40 year old activist seeks less neurotic, laid back, Christian male to go on dates if she can possibly find time in her schedule..."
Ummm...okay, so I made this resolution to go on a date in 2013. To be honest I hadn't thought much of dating until I made the resolution but now, since I've thought about it, this might not be as easy as I thought!
So, to make it less complicated, here are a few tips for any guy who is thinking of asking me out:
1) First of all, I'm oblivious. Like really, really oblivious. So flirting doesn't work. Unless you are REALLY obvious, I don't pick it up...and if you are REALLY obvious, then I get freaked out a little because then I think you are REALLY desperate! Aside from that, I don't flirt well. I over think things and so I'm trying to figure out what you really mean or how you will respond to this or that...I'm not good at improv for the same reasons. So, simple and direct would be nice. It makes things easier!
2) If you ask me if I have a "boo" we are automatically done. Especially if you are my age, then it sounds even more ridiculous.
3) You are going to have to be really patient...and a night owl. Considering I usually get out of rehearsals around 9:00-9:30...there's a reason why Taco Mac, iHop and Steak and Shake get most of our dining out business!
4) You don't have to be as driven or passionate about issues as I am...as a matter of fact, it's probably better if you aren't! That much kinetic energy in a relationship would be...explosive. But it's nice if you actually care about something.
5) I'm a practical romantic and a nerd. I love flowers, but if I can plant them...I'll probably like them even better. And if it is a book I've been wanting to read, I'd probably love it even more!
6) I'm independent...but old fashioned in some ways. I'm not going to pursue you. If you like me, take a chance and ask me out. It can only end in one of two ways: yes or no. It's not like I'm going to run you over with my car!
7) Don't want to hear my entire life story on the first date? Good! Because I don't want to tell you! Taking the whole evening to talk about myself doesn't sound fun to me! On the other hand, I'd love to hear about you...unless it's an hour long vent about how horrible your ex-wife is and how she ruined your children.
8) Don't like teenagers? No need to apply.
Oh my gosh...l may never date again!!!
What about you guys? What are things about you or dating would you want everyone to know?
Ummm...okay, so I made this resolution to go on a date in 2013. To be honest I hadn't thought much of dating until I made the resolution but now, since I've thought about it, this might not be as easy as I thought!
So, to make it less complicated, here are a few tips for any guy who is thinking of asking me out:
1) First of all, I'm oblivious. Like really, really oblivious. So flirting doesn't work. Unless you are REALLY obvious, I don't pick it up...and if you are REALLY obvious, then I get freaked out a little because then I think you are REALLY desperate! Aside from that, I don't flirt well. I over think things and so I'm trying to figure out what you really mean or how you will respond to this or that...I'm not good at improv for the same reasons. So, simple and direct would be nice. It makes things easier!
2) If you ask me if I have a "boo" we are automatically done. Especially if you are my age, then it sounds even more ridiculous.
3) You are going to have to be really patient...and a night owl. Considering I usually get out of rehearsals around 9:00-9:30...there's a reason why Taco Mac, iHop and Steak and Shake get most of our dining out business!
4) You don't have to be as driven or passionate about issues as I am...as a matter of fact, it's probably better if you aren't! That much kinetic energy in a relationship would be...explosive. But it's nice if you actually care about something.
5) I'm a practical romantic and a nerd. I love flowers, but if I can plant them...I'll probably like them even better. And if it is a book I've been wanting to read, I'd probably love it even more!
6) I'm independent...but old fashioned in some ways. I'm not going to pursue you. If you like me, take a chance and ask me out. It can only end in one of two ways: yes or no. It's not like I'm going to run you over with my car!
7) Don't want to hear my entire life story on the first date? Good! Because I don't want to tell you! Taking the whole evening to talk about myself doesn't sound fun to me! On the other hand, I'd love to hear about you...unless it's an hour long vent about how horrible your ex-wife is and how she ruined your children.
8) Don't like teenagers? No need to apply.
Oh my gosh...l may never date again!!!
What about you guys? What are things about you or dating would you want everyone to know?
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